I'm a total newbie to this but the idea of being totally humiliated by a woman has been dancing around in my head for quite a while. Probably, I don't need to go into specifics right now as I suppose only a woman with the right skills would bother to reply. Things like age and nationality don't apply in this sort of situation, do they? Anyway, I hope someone will take pity on me, an Englishman who is getting on in years but still has joi de vivre. Please, whip me into shape.